Filling out a credit card application my friend came upon a question “what is your source of income?” He wrote ATM.
A wealthy 75-year-old widower starts showing up around town with a beautiful and much younger wife. ‘How did you get her to marry you?’ his friend asks.
‘I lied about my age.’
‘You told her you were 60?’
‘No, I told her I was 90.’
When my son was visiting, I complained that my TV wasn’t as bright as sharp as usual. He worked on it during the afternoon and that night we turned the set on.
‘What did you do?’ I said happily, ‘Everything looks great.’
He replied, ‘I wiped the screen.’