There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn't swim. When a boat
came by, the captain yelled, "Do you need help, sir?" The preacher
calmly said "No, God will save me." A little later, another boat came
by and a fisherman asked, "Hey, do you need help?" The preacher
replied again, "No God will save me." Eventually the preacher drowned
& went to heaven. The preacher asked God, "Why didn't you save
me?" God replied, "Fool, I sent you two boats!"
A man is talking to God. "God, how long is a million years?" God
answers, "To me, it's about a minute." "God, how much is a
million dollars?" "To me, it's a penny." "God, may I have a
penny?" "Wait a minute."
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